Renji and Byakuya and the Strawberry Shortcake
by KuronoMizu
Summary: It's Byakuya's birthday, and Renji shows up at the Kuchiki estate to...make him a celebratory shortcake? Then chemistry happens, tensions break and...well, you must read to find out. Warning: RenByaku shonen-ai, & yaoi will follow. Incomplete as of yet.
1. Try It, Taichou?

Disclaimer: No, I don't own Bleach; the fact of the matter is...it owns my soul.

A/N: Dun-dun-dun… I bring you a stupid RenByaku fic! Original idea and, erm, lighter stuff (aka Chap. 1 and 2) by me and -coughcough- …_heavier_ bits to be done by my friend "Peachy." (Actually, by anyone--feel free to write me an ending to this and send it to me; I'll take as many as there are and see which one is the best.)  
You see, I really did want to finish this fic, but my poor innocent brain just couldn't process things at the point where stuff started getting more and more lemony. Thus, a collaboration is needed.

So here we have it, a fic that was started on Byakuya's birthday a _whole year ago_ (1/31/2007) and is, well, still incomplete. Sorry. But hey, I posted it a day after this year's b-day, so that makes up for it a bit, right?  
By the way, this is essentially my first actual fanfic, so yeah...Be nice.

Enjoy! If you dislike yaoi or shonen-ai or this pairing...just...do yourself a favor and don't read. Here we go!

* * *

Mini-Glossary _(words are italicized in story)_

_Kenseikan:_ white things Byakuya wears in his hair (shows he's a noble)

_Jigoku-chō:_ "hell butterfly"

_Oi:_ Hey!  
(Other terms will be noted later in the story) --

* * *

The frozen sun was just starting its descent from the sky. It was January 31st—the day of Kuchiki Byakuya's birthday. 

A lone shinigami arrived at the main entrance to the Kuchiki estate, trying to keep his teeth from chattering. Trying…and failing.

_DA-AAMN it's cold_, thought Abarai Renji, sullenly gritting his teeth. _Gotta be under ten frickin' degrees out here. _He tugged at a small pulley by the door's threshold that rang a system of bells inside the main house. Hopping from one foot to the other, he wondered how long it would take a servant to just answer the stupid _door_. At last a young woman slid it open and blinked in surprise.

"A-Abarai-fukutaichou? May I ask why you're here?"

Renji stared tensely at the wall behind her. "I have personal business with Kuchiki-taichou." _Well, sorta, _he thought. _I'm pretty much showin' up here with no warning to speak of. _"Can I—uhh…_may_ I come in?"

The poor maid looked ready to slap herself for forgetting her manners. "Yes, of course! Come right in, you'll catch your death. I apologize!" Smiling politely, she asked Renji if he wanted to send for the captain.

Renji nodded stiffly, butterflies growing in his stomach. _Hope this won't be _tooo_ awkward…wait, what am I thinking? Grow some balls, ya pansy!

* * *

_

A couple of minutes later, Byakuya himself arrived in the entrance hall. He was dressed in a light-colored casual robe and hadn't bothered to put his hair into _kenseikan_. After all, it was the man's birthday, and he had clearly been relaxing the day away. _If it's even _possible_ that Kuchiki-taichou does relax_, mused the redhead. He wanted to roll his eyes. But…

Renji thought he could feel a faint warmth rising to his ears. He'd never seen his captain with jet-black locks so loose across his face and clothes draped so casually over his body, and…and jeez, _this_ reaction was unexpected. _Why the _hell _am I looking at Kuchiki like this?! Stop that, you dumbass!_ Arms behind his back, he pinched his wrist to regain composure.

Byakuya was speaking. "Well? What is it? If the business is important, you could have sent a _jigoku-chō._"

"Y'see…Kuchiki-taichou, the thing is…" Renji started, eyes trained casually on the ground to avoid getting that strange feeling again. "Since it's your birthday…wait, how old're you again? Today, I mean?"

"Hmm, should I?…" the dark-haired man murmured to himself, then gave a subdued, enigmatic smile and said aloud, "No, I will not tell you. However, I _am_ between five hundred and five thousand years old." The mysterious smile morphed into a smirk. "Now, what were you saying?"

"Ah, thanks for the hint," Renji replied, failing to mask his sarcasm. …_Prick. Thinks he's so witty…wait. Taichou? Witty? Since _when?

"Anyway," he continued, "since it's your birthday, and I don't have a present for you, I was thinking…never mind, I should leave now. I wouldn't wanna bother Taichou."

"No, what is it? You've piqued my curiosity." The nobleman looked expectantly at his subordinate. "…Tell me."

"It…it's nothing. Well…" he relented, "all right. I was thinking I could _make _you something. Something food-wise."

Byakuya's delicate eyebrows rose just the slightest amount. "Oh? I wasn't aware you cooked…Abarai," he said, coolly dropping the vice-captain status at the end of Renji's surname.

_So casual…huh_, thought Renji. "Baking, to be exact," he responded. He'd been hesitant to let his captain discover this—until now, only Rukia had known about Renji's little hobby. He was a bit nervous about letting anyone else know, afraid it might threaten his 'manly pride.'

"Do you like strawberries?" Renji said from out of nowhere.

"Ex…excuse me?" Byakuya blinked. "Why…do you ask?"

_Huh, I wonder what was going through HIS mind, _thought Renji. _Y'know…I don't want to know. _"See, I was thinking instead of the traditional cake, I could make a strawberry shortcake…unless you'd rather have just a cake; I can do that!" added Renji quickly.

"No, I would be glad to have the shortcake…I have never tried one, in fact," said Byakuya, tilting his head just a little. He quickly cleared his throat. "That is, _if _you do want to make one. I…would be honored."

_Honored? Seriously??_ thought Renji. _Hmm, maybe the great Kuchiki has a serious sweet tooth he's not tellin' me about…_He grinned. "Yes, I do. Can I use one of the kitchens?"

"_May _you," Byakuya automatically corrected. Renji groaned inwardly—he'd just gotten the stupid grammar right a few minutes ago; why'd he have to screw up _now_… "And yes, you may. I will take you to the best-equipped facility. This way." Byakuya turned and motioned with a slender finger as he exited the main hall.  
_  
Here goes_, thought the redhead, following suit.

* * *

Renji washed his hands in the sink and got ready to start. He was still in shock at the size of this place. _It's at least four times the size of the sorry excuse for a kitchen in my quarters. Damn, if only I lived here…_He stopped abruptly, realizing what that would mean, and hastily turned and grabbed the only spare apron in the kitchen—a pink frilly number with lace around the edges. He cursed. _Fine, I just won't let anyone see me wearing this godforsaken thing. That'd be just _perfect_ for my rep._

On the way to the storeroom to gather some ingredients, Renji passed by Byakuya, who had settled into a sitting room near the kitchen. With his head propped up against the back of one graceful hand, he was reading one of the many historical records in the Kuchiki collection.

_God, could you read something more boring, please?_ thought Renji, trying to still the sudden, tiny spark that had leaped up in him when he saw the man's deep-blue eyes glancing casually downwards. _And it's his birthday, fer Chrissake!_ _How can he find stuff like that more interesting than actual people…_

…_like me? _added a little voice in his head.

_Wait…waitaminnit…_he thought, doing a double take. _Those…those are reading glasses! What…the…._ hell? Surprise, surprise. Inside the place Byakuya called home, Renji was learning way more about him every _second_ than he had over the past several years as his vice-captain.

Shaking his head a little to bring his mind back into focus, Renji headed on toward the storeroom. Byakuya watched him go, amused in spite of himself. _Foolish boy. You honestly thought I wouldn't notice you there? …Or is it that you just didn't care?_ Something about him had Byakuya feeling an easy warmth inside, despite the slight chill in the house. He went back to reading with a rare smile on his features.

* * *

The sound of chopping from the cutting board could be heard from several rooms away as Renji carefully sliced each ripe strawberry in half. He cut the last one, washed the knife and put it away. Though he told himself not to, he started pacing the wood floor of the kitchen. 

_Okay, now that the shortcake's almost done, all I gotta do is spread on some cream, stick the strawberries around the top…and drizzle a little chocolate sauce for good measure. _He paused, trying not to think of Byakuya and chocolate at the same time. If his mind stayed on that for more than a couple seconds, it started to take him places he'd rather not go. _But more importantly…how will Mr. High-and-Mighty react? He'd _better_ like it! _

Worry, worry, worry.

_Maybe I should try some myself first, just to make sure it's good. And even more importantly…_

…_how will I stop myself from looking at him like that again? 'Cause that was just frickin' _weird.

He glanced at the hourglass on the counter. _Argh, time's up. _Renji lifted the shortcake, golden and crispy-looking, out of the oven and began smoothing fluffy cream over it.

* * *

"Oiii, Kuchiki-taichou! It's ready…I think!" Renji's voice carried into the other room, his voice cracking a little. He winced._ Damn. And wow, that was familiar of me. A little _too_ familiar._ "Would you come try it?" he asked formally after clearing his throat. 

The sound of light footsteps approached the kitchen. Renji threw off the accursed pink apron just before Byakuya appeared in the doorway, taking off his reading glasses and setting them folded on a side table. He crossed his arms. "Ready? At last? I see…It took you long enough…" His eyes scarcely masked the teasing smirk behind them.

"_Temee_---At least I made the damn thing. Are you gonna try it or not?" he demanded, not at all aware of how uncouth he was acting. He turned his sullen face toward the shortcake. Why was it that _both_ siblings of the Kuchiki clan were so…frustrating?  
(_Temee_: Rude word for "you"---basically "bastard")

Byakuya watched this with clear amusement. "My apologies, Abarai-kun. Of course I will." He stepped closer to where Renji was standing in front of the counter.

Renji, bent over the cake, shot a sidelong glance at him. The vice-captain couldn't take it any longer—he wanted feedback NOW.

Plucking a cream-doused strawberry from on top of the shortcake, Renji dipped it in the extra chocolate sauce—dark chocolate, of course—and, before he even knew what he was doing, plunged it into Byakuya's mouth.

(End Chapter 1.)


	2. Point of No Return

Disclaimer: I am forever doomed to...well...not own Bleach. O fie, fie, cruel fate!

A/N: Aaand we're back with an incomplete Chapter 2. By the way, if anyone cares, this fic has a theme song I picked after I'd started writing it—"Come In From The Cold" by Joni Mitchell...By some weird coincidence, this laid-back, insightful song fits reeally well with the story (except the first few lyrics or so) So if you feel like it, you can go and look at the lyrics or find somewhere to hear the song and whatnot...Anyway, presenting more Ren-Byaku-shortcake-hawtness!

* * *

_Part II._

The whole world might as well have had a "pause" button--and it had just been pushed. Renji just stood there, a bright red tint starting at his cheeks and fanning out to his ears, with the tips of his fingers just inside Byakuya's pale lips. Byakuya, hand paused in midair, looked down at Renji's own hand, showing faint signs of surprise.

Renji, finally realizing what he'd done, was about to withdraw his hand and just brush off the whole faux-pas with some joke, laughing like an idiot. But before that could happen, Byakuya's raised hand held Renji's still as he licked the remaining cream and chocolate off Renji's fingers one-by-one, locking eyes the whole time.

A tingle coursed through Renji's tensed arm and down his spine as his heart rate started to speed up. Byakuya let go of him and chewed the strawberry before swallowing it, then stated plainly in his deep voice, "That was exquisite. You must have worked hard to make everything so...delicious."

Renji stiffened and blushed almost as red as his hair, wondering what the hell was going to happen now, where this was going…Well, he knew one thing. They'd gone somewhere past the mere relationship of officer and adjutant, that was for sure. This was the point of no return.

And Renji…well, Renji had no idea what to do anymore.

"It was…nothing," he managed hoarsely, mind whirling as though he were on drugs. "It's not like I made the _strawberry_ or somethin'," he laughed tensely.

"I know."

"I really should've tried it before letting—" Renji trailed off.

"Ah, would you like to taste it? Here, allow me." Without warning, Byakuya took Renji's chin in his hand, leaned in, and captured his mouth.

Renji's eyes widened, but he closed them and surrendered, letting the sensation of the kiss mingle with the symphony of flavors in Byakuya's mouth and soft _soft _lips, flavors he'd created himself…the whipped cream and rich chocolate sauce made from scratch, the fresh ripe strawberry…And no mistaking it, there was definitely the taste of Byakuya—

It was too much. Renji could feel his self-control trickling away, and he broke off and looked away, wide-eyed and panting. "I could've…tried some…myself, y'know!" he said in a low growl.

An enigmatic smile hinted at the corners of the older man's lips. He licked a dab of cream from them, saying in a sultry voice, "Oh, but I think you much preferred things this way."

His paralyzing blue eyes were drenched with…what was the word that came to Renji's mind?

_Desire._ Yeah, that was definitely it. And it was making Byakuya look sexy as hell—_Even more than usual_, thought Renji, finally admitting to himself that okay, maybe he _had_ always been drawn to the captain in some way, shape or form. _But not like now—now is kinda different. Like it's stronger or somethin'..._

It was true; the air was practically pulsing crimson between them, sparks flying, each waiting for the other to make the next move. Renji was still having a little trouble wrapping his mind around the notion that he could be this powerfully attracted to another man, but he was already stepping back towards him, burning, aching for more.

This time Renji led the way, driving Byakuya back until they bumped up against the counter. A small pitcher of milk tipped over and spilled in the background, but neither of the men noticed, let alone cared. Byakuya's off-white robe had slipped slightly from his right shoulder and Renji took full advantage, lips moving hungrily along the bared flesh. He was brushing aside one of his dark locks and moving up his neck when Byakuya ordered, "Stop."

_...How can he keep his damn bossy attitude at a time like this?_ Renji groaned inwardly. "Oh come _on_, what is it?" His frantic need raised his voice a few pitches.

Byakuya attempted to catch his breath. "Have you lost your senses completely…or are you aware…that we are still in a kitchen?" From his tone of voice, he obviously knew the answer was the first one.

Renji glanced around at their surroundings. What the hell. If they ended up going further, they could be on the wood flooring for all he cared. They could even be outside in the deathly cold—they had more than enough heat between the two of them to make up for that anyway. He grabbed Byakuya by the collar of his loose _yukata_ and was about to fling him down to the floor when the captain interrupted again.

"I said stop, before I have you discharged from Squad 6! Did you not hear me?"

"Jeezus, who shoved a stick up _your _ass?!" growled Renji, then clapped a hand over his mouth, realizing there were certain…connotations behind his words.

Byakuya snorted lightly. "I will pretend that last comment was never made. …My, look at that shortcake"—he interjected, turning his head to indicate said cake—"it's so perfect, and we are merely letting it sit there. Do you think, perhaps, we should…have it somewhere else? In a more…accommodating—"

He was interrupted by Renji who, already catching on, grabbed the shortcake and the two forks that were lying there. Then Byakuya suddenly gripped the wrist of the hand holding the forks and Renji was _shunpō_-ed off to the sitting room he had seen not long before. Of course, when he _had _seen it, he had no idea that…that things like this would be taking place here.  
(Shunpō: "flash step")

Renji pulled his hand free of his taichou's grasp and swiftly slid the shortcake onto a small table near the wall—getting it out of the way. Not wanting to lose the moment, Renji wasted no time in tossing Byakuya down (on a futon? couch? He didn't notice and cared even less), and—

"Who gave you permission to treat your captain so roughly?" demanded Byakuya, but it was clear that even he was losing his dignified, regal air.

By then Renji was bent over him, already pulling the loose robe off Byakuya's shoulders and hastily fumbling with the knot tied at the waist. It was now or never; he'd actually built up enough nerve to say it:

"I don't give a damn if you _are_ my taichou…" he muttered breathily, "…I'm gonna screw you senseless. Happy birthday."

Byakuya only gave an amused laugh. "I'd like to see you try, _kozou_."

(_Kozou_: "little boy," or just _boy_)

Leaning down until their lips were barely touching, Renji murmured, "You would, huh?" and took Byakuya's mouth by force.

* * *

A/N: And I am _soo sorry_, people, but that is simply all I have at the moment. Since my friend has absolutely been putting off working on the lemon-y part that follows, I've been trying to get possible versions from others---people that I know and, well, now you guys too. I'll consider anything that I'm given (yes, I am willing to read the yaoi-tastic endings that people can come up with---it _is_ my story; I hafta---but I just can't process 'n write a lemon sequence myself; my brain is not quite so corrupted yet and would likely explode. Eheh.) 

Credit will be given where credit is due; give it a try! Or else this story may be left hanging until the end of time, and you don't want that, now do you...?

Things to keep in mind: the power struggle between Ren&Byaku (as in, literally---switching a few times between seme/uke, each trying to be the one on top...'cause you know they would...) Hint: Renji wins, using the element of surprise.  
Don't worry about the wrapping up of the fic, I've got that taken care of. Just the lemony part. Good luck!

R&R, please & thanks! Also, if you liked this, go check out my drabbles under the name of "It's Drabble Time"--there aren't many, but the first one is a hinted RenByaku one that's kinda-sorta supposed to be a companion to this fic (though they really don't have much to do with each other...). Thanks again to the lovely reviewers!


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